Jitsuroku: Naku made Bokorarete Hajimete Koi ni Ochimashita.

For as long as he can remember, the protagonist has harbored a deeply hidden and unconventional desire. He possesses a masochistic nature, finding that his physical arousal is inextricably linked to experiencing pain and suffering. Recognizing how incomprehensible these urges are—even to himself—he spent years quietly suppressing them, locking away his true feelings behind a carefully maintained facade of normalcy. However, no amount of restraint could last forever, and eventually, the dam holding back his intense, unspoken cravings finally broke. The turning point arrives when he endures a severe beating so intense that it moves him to tears for the very first time in his life. Yet, rather than feeling only agony or fear, this overwhelming experience awakens something entirely unexpected within him. In that vulnerable, tearful moment, he realizes he is experiencing genuine romantic love for the first time as well. This narrative serves as a raw, autobiographical account of a twenty-three-year-old navigating an unconventional path to romance. Far from a traditional love story, it chronicles his slightly extreme journey of self-discovery, exploring how the sudden collapse of his emotional boundaries led him directly into the profound depths of his first real relationship.